It's All In The Tone

When my son first announced his engagement is what I would call "Hell Week" Steve and I felt so tested, first by the kids choice to marry several months earlier than in the original plan Cam outlined to us before he proposed, and second by their choices in wedding party.

I heard for the first time out of my sons mouth the horrible selfish words.

"IT'S MY WEDDING"

By the tone of his voice, I realized by saying that phrase he was saying I will hurt anyone I want, be as selfish as I want, and do anything I want all in the name of my wedding and YOU have to go along with it.

"OH NO YOU DIDN'T"

One thing you don't do is push this momma bears buttons! He got a good sitting down and the lines were drawn. The first words immediately omitted from my sons vocabulary was "IT'S MY WEDDING"

Once he realized that we completely understand it is their wedding, we all want the same thing he does, that we are behind him all the way, that it is our desire to please and make a day exactly what he wanted all hurts were forgiven and we moved on...

After all... It is your wedding...

One More Month

I'll bet you thought by the title of this post that I was going to talk about the fact that Cameron and Rebekah's wedding is one month from TODAY!!!

I'll bet you thought I would write something thoughtful and reflecting but in reality...

I wish we had just one month more... One more month... Two more paychecks to be exact... One more month to collect more... MONEY

As parents of the groom, my husband has always thought that we got to just show up on the specific day, cry a little, and Partaaaayyyy. The first thing my husband said as we were leaving the sonograms announcing we were having a son was "Well, at least we won't have to pay for a wedding"

I never thought that though. For me, being involved in the wedding process is my pleasure, actually, give me a budget and the kids could pretty much just show up and get married and everything would be done for them. I get off on stuff like this.

We found we needed to help pay for the wedding on a greater level than we expected and because we are a single income family, financial contribution for a wedding is easier said than done...

We can always find a way to pay for things somehow, God always provides and I refuse to let something like Money stand in the way of my sons dream wedding, but ask my hubby to open his wallet and pay for something unexpected and my jolly old elf turns into a grumpy old dwarf. So... We will keep most of the costs a secret... (luckily, he doesn't read blogs Hee Hee Hee)

I love watching wedding shows but lately, those shows are a bitter pill to swallow when you see the cost of the napkin rings on the Platinum wedding show is more than our entire budget.

I just try to keep things in perspective... It is all about the marriage and the kids would be just as married if they went to the Public Library and saw the state clerk as if they arrived to the ceremony by hot air balloon, ate caviar and had dinner served by waiters in white gloves.

Our kids DESERVE the best, after all, their wedding will be a once in a lifetime event, not only for Cam and Beka but for all the guests as well. I have never known a couple who have made such a commitment to God and his plan for purity. I have never seen a wedding where purity rings will be exchanged, and I especially have never seen (or heard of) a wedding where the couple will share their first real kiss on the lips when they say "I do"

Cam and Beka are such a special couple, they deserve to be told "Whatever you want" but alas, the best their families can say is "Whatever you need"

I know all will be well, this wedding will be wonderful, everyone will be happy, and especially blessed, but for us that are behind the scenes I think we will always wish we could do more...

My Wish

My Wish
Rascal Flatts

I hope the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
And each road leads you where you wanna go,
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile.

But more than anything, more than anything...

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you,
and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.I hope you never look back,
but you never forget, All the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
And you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
And always give more than you take.

But more than anything, yeah, more than anything...

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish. Yeah, yeah.

The Trash Went Out

Never thought I would see the day when I was sad to see the trash go out, but today my heart smile (Troy word) was a little bit glum, not a complete upside down frown, just a little bit glum.

I discussed it with him and he said he was OK with all that he threw away so I decided I had to be OK with it too.

NOT!!!

I did refrain from digging through the trash and you got to give me kudos for that or this list would have been way longer.

Here is what I rescued because I KNOW my son will need these things for his future.

1. A vintage travel iron I got at a yard sale. Hey this thing is handy dandy and ohh so retro

2. Books-
A)How to draw fantasy creatures (f0r Eric of course)
B) Lord of the Rings Weapon and Warfare guide (indeed a future classic)
C) Incredible Cross Sections (Now Come on, this book is really cool! Where else can you see where the bathroom is on a Viking Ship)
D) Hardback red letter Bible (shame, shame, shame)

3. The Camping Owl- It is kind of a Cub Scout Trophy. When I was a Scout leader and we would camp, I would send the boys on a scavenger hunt for the most unusual things they could find. Cam found this super cool plastic flying Owl and all the other boys went crazy for it. It was the ultimate find, so much better than gunshot shells, rocks, sticks, etc...

And Lastly... My Son's future will definitely not be the same without this...

4. A Big Orange Dr Seuss Fish - This is a prop from the Seussical Musical he was in last year and a really memorable part of his Senior year.

Now that I wrote this down I am really glad I didnt look in the trash cans, Still it was sad when I got home and saw the cans had been emptied...

Don't worry dear... Your treasures are safe with me.

****Gongggggggggg****

Today I was writing the date on a bag 8-6-08, all of a sudden it was like a giant loud GONGGGGGG went off in my ear.

8-6-08 that means tomorrow will be 8-7-08! One month until I am a MOG!!!

(If you don't know by now, I am normally MOD which is Mom Of Dudes but soon I will be a MOG which is Mother Of Groom which will then make me MILOB Mother In Law Of Beka) Your head spinning yet? Just wait til I am a Graham Cracker!!!

I turned to the woman who was substituting in our kitchen and does not know me from Adam (gotta research that phrase) and said "My son is getting married in a month from tomorrow"

I got a Smile with no teeth from the kindly sub which means (this lady is crazy) and a courtesy "Great"

Breathe Troy... Breathe

Drooling

We have lived in this small house for 23 years. When we moved in it was the two of us in a three bedroom house, we used one bedroom as a den and one room was for me and my crafts. We had a formal living room and dining room. Our cute little house was a dream.

When our first child came along we re-arranged the house losing the formal living room but I still had my craft room. I am a craft type of gal and I needed my room for all my "stuff".

When baby #2 came along, we decided that instead of moving like our neighbors did we would stay in our little house which had now reached maximum capacity, there was no longer a formal living room, each and every inch of the house was now utilized and my personal craft space was a thing of the past.

Crafts are still something I love to do, but my projects are limited to the super quick and simple because I craft on the kitchen table and cant leave anything undone lying around.

When our son announced he was getting married and moving out, the wheels began turning in my mind. Craft room... Ahhhhhh.

I began eyeballing craft room designs basically I was drooling for my newfound space.

Then I wondered... Can I change the room the second he moves out or is there a rule that I must wait a respectable amount of time "mourning" my baby moving out?

How would it look for people to come here for the rehearsal dinner and the room is already re-painted and decorated? Hmmmmm It is a dilemma.

NOT! I have been waiting far too long for this little house to grow an extra room. So here is the plan...

#1 Son moves out
#2 Paint
#3 Re-decorate

Enjoy!!!

Love you Cam, but I can't wait to have my own room again.

Kudos

Today, my future daughter in law received her Kudos as the soon to be wife of a boy who never cleaned his room.

She got him to do the impossible, throw his stuff away.

I have always told him to use two words when cleaning "No Mercy" But today he did just that and I really wish he had given me warning because there were some things I would have liked to keep.

Just silly mementos of a childhood in the same room which now filled two large trash cans but they were my memories too. I know my sentiments are shared by Steve and Eric because looking at the "trash" we all wanted to go in and rescue it. " I wonder if a boy at church would like this unopened science kit? These books are so cool, I know they would be loved by another boy who's interests were Star Wars and Lord of the Rings"...

Oh well... Gotta let it go...

But here is the clincher and why my future daughter in law gets the kudos. I didn't hear one word of griping. Not one belittling word of "How could you live like this?" and to that I was proud of the woman my son has chosen. Now mind you, we were not in the room while they were cleaning and she may have been saying plenty, but to us in the other room we heard nothing which shows me she cares for her future husbands dignity and to that I say "Well Done Beka"

Now where is that plastic Owl you found on our Cub Scout camping trip?